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Friend socials at the Matador from 1988

1988



“I came out to a social with Birmingham that used to be held at a pub at the Head (The [Matador)] which was a straight pub but the landlord was gay-friendly. He let a room out of a Friday night. I was quite shocked and a little naive. It was full of predominantly old men 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s. Some of them involved in the counseling charity didn't have the best intentions and were using it in my opinion for their own sexual exploitation of people who were vulnerable. Some of the men there were using it as a chat-up place. I was quite disillusioned because you grow up with all these negative feelings about being gay and then you meet a lot of stereotypes that you have and you're being tolerant because you want to kind of fit in although they're not really your type of people. I always felt very much on the outside that they weren't that really interested in me and I had nothing in common with them. After a few visits to the I was quite put off with it. I couldn't really relate to people that were sort of making little sexual innuendos. I just wanted to find somebody I could get along with, someone of my own age.

Contributed by: Derek, 35

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